Chapter 2: Page 15
This week demonstrates another interesting element to our production process. Specifically how much we decide to show on a single page, not necessarily how we decide to show it. The original draft of the page is below:
As you can see, we originally omitted the bottom row, and instead chose to end on Quinlan’s attempt at diplomacy. The idea here would’ve been to have what is now the bottom row be blown out to an entire page next week. After ruminating on the above treatment, we ultimately decided against it, resulting in the addition of an extra row of panels that resolves the scene a bit better.
If we were doing a standard print comic, we probably would’ve gone with the extra page, but the webcomic medium is, of course, a bit different. With a full week between pages, we need to make sure to keep the pace tight. When we do hang on a moment for a whole week, we want it to be major and important (like the building action to Hardin’s introduction part-way through Chapter 1). This time around, we decided to keep the pace moving, tightening the action and reaching a resolution to the dialog instead of a cliffhanger. It’s a minor detail, perhaps, but an important one to us.
Next week, both Rachel and I will be attending New York Comic Con, so we probably won’t have time to get a page up. We will instead have a fun placeholder sketch for you, but regular pages will pick up again the following Saturday!
No, Kenosh, stop making me feel bad for you in the space of one page, you bloody old otter, especially with your expression in the second to last panel. I am showing so much favoritism to you and Hardin that it isn’t fair. :v But on another note, Quinlan’s face is hilarious. You have good intentions, Quin; you just need to work on your expressions while you execute said good intentions.
But I hope both of you webcomic creators have fun at Comic Con!
“I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe… Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Lutra. I watched swords glitter in the dark near the H’arkenlowe Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears… in… rain.”
“Dad, you’re scaring me.”
Dubiously Relevant Fact of the Day:
Rutger Hauer partially improvised that speech. The original was longer and much less impressive.
To this day not even Ridley Scott knows what the “Tannhäuser Gate” is.
I believe that the Tannhauser Gate is some kind of space thing.
I saymit’s a certain portion of space through which people can easily travel to… some…. important…. solar system?
I understand your reasoning, but you have to admit that the initial layout is much more visually pleasing. Do you have any plans to redo pages for the eventual print version?
Keep an eye out for the extended edition, which will include over 50 new never-before-seen pages seamlessly integrated into the story, and 2 volumes of other extras, including Kenosh’s long poem, “Salmon, My Love.”
…and we don’t talk about the bass.
Now packaged with 50% more nightmare fuel.
That reminds of when I was little and when to see the blockbuster Lutren action movie “From Salmon, with love.”
I liked “Sockeye” more.
A minor quibble: the lighting on this page gives off more of a sunset vibe to me. In my experience, by the time the sun is that high, things are a bit brighter. But then again, there are lots of sunrises I haven’t seen, so maybe this is normal in some places.
As for the content of the page, I actually like this layout! Sure, it feels a little crowded, but it’s also a nice picking up of pace. A “moving on” of sorts.
And Dakkan’s expression in the second panel is absolute tops. (I mean, they all are, but that one especially)
I agree with PBJ, both about the lighting/sky coloring and about the page layout. When we first cut from the bandit scene to our three protagonists resuming their march, I couldn’t tell at first whether a whole day was supposed to have passed and evening was falling, or if it was only a short time later around sunrise. Perhaps a bit more blue to the sky would help? And while I wouldn’t want every page to be as “crowded” as this one (although haven’t there been plenty of previous pages with five or six panels?) I do think the final result here is a nice change of pace, and leaves things at a perfect place for a pause – a nice little breather before the action picks up again. I’d say you made the right choice.
Oh, and wouldn’t the Epic Salmon Poem be Dak’s composition, not Kenosh’s?
Have fun at Comic Con, guys!
You…are probably right. I’ve been slacking on my Salmon Lore Studies. But hey! Dakkan most have gotten it from somewhere!
So basically Kenosh’s speech’s translation: I have seen some sh*t.
Also, I like how awkward Quin looks in the third-to-last panel, how Dakkan still looks kind of worried in the second panel, and Kenosh’s expression in the second-to-last panel.
“If you could see what I’ve seen.”
Yeah, I’ve been to the internet too, Kenosh, I feel your pain! : (
Once you have beheld the abyss that stares back, you cannot unsee it.
Why putting just ONE sketch filler, though? Why not many?
With backround lore details! I love me some backround lore details!
As do I, but c’mon– New York Comic Con. Quite frankly, I wouldn’t want to be pushing myself to work hard on tons of filler before that, either. Alex and Rachel need a break now and then. Also, if you haven’t seen the preview for the sketch on tumblr, it’s amazing.
Throwing a few chips into the betting pool; seconded. Anyone else?
Nah, I don’t see it happening. Ashtor is already penned for that role, and two mentor characters dying would be just awkward.
Hmm. Well, it’s either going to be one or the other; I’m not sure who to have more hope or fear for at this point.
Oh man… I thought I was the only one who got Blade Runner vibes from Kenosh’s words…
Anyway, once again I’m behind schedule in my comments. I visited NYC about a month ago and since getting home I’ve been kinda busy with other stuff (translation: too lazy). At least I’m only a month behind and not a year and a half, so let’s get crackin!
Not much to say here that hasn’t been said by others. Interesting talk about the proper page layout. However, Quinlan’s expression in the fourth panel, while funny, makes me wish even more that you had gone with the cutaway to his reaction to Ken preparing to hit Dak in the last page. The way this all comes together makes him seem rather blasé about the whole event.
Still, a nice page, like always.
Sorry for being late to this party, but:
I disagree about Quinlan. He looks like he’s trying to come off as, not blasé per se, but at least unfazed. However he looks pretty visibly weirded out by the whole thing, between the crossed arms, slightly hunched posture, wide eyes, and not-very-successful attempt to force a smile. (I’d have to check, but I don’t remember seeing him in a crossed-arms pose before.)
Most. Awesome. Kenosh. Moment. Ever.