Chapter 2: Page 23
This week, the plan comes together! In addition to finally getting to see some hints of Bevan in action, this page also represents some of the more fun elements in doing a webcomic — at least for me!
For starters, you may notice that in the original version of the page, the walls of Deltrada Garrison are made of wood. For a time, before the fortress was actually situated in the mountain pass itself, they were! But after reader observations last week and some additional discussion on our end, we decided that the stone walls do fit the garrison’s background more accurately and updated it to stone.
This segues into one of the nice things about releasing pages in a webcomic format — it’s a living format that is flexible enough to allow us to post edits and changes after the fact. With a week between pages, it can be difficult to translate my script or notes precisely to the visual medium, or sometimes my ideas can be tweaked to make a stronger concept or idea, but we don’t realize it until after the fact. While we never plan to change plot points in this fashion, we do treat the webcomic as a living entity that lets us tweak and improve based on reader feedback.
Another element in the above page you might notice is Hardin’s use of the word “c’oth.” This is a derogatory Ermehn word that originally appeared in an early draft of Chapter 1 but hasn’t yet made its official appearance in the story. It’s not in the script for the page, but Rachel will occasionally play around with alternate language or wordage to pace scenes in a better way. The phrase “storm-dark” is another example of this that did make it into the script but wasn’t in there originally.
This week, we’re gifted with some appropriately festive fanart from SaraaLuna of Enerus the Canid sporting a most amazing Christmas sweater.
I can’t think of a better way to lead into the holidays than with a grumpy, glowering Canid! I’m already formulating the animated Christmas special in my head :) Thanks for the continued love, SaraaLuna — we love your stuff!
Huh, so Bevan’s hood is not a fashion statement but for staying undetected. Are the others avoiding him then because he has a bad reputation as a cutthroat?
It’s possible you’re a very accurate little ray of sunshine on predicting his fate.
I don’t think a hood alone would be enough to stay undetected. Back at page 1-58, Alex said it was to conceal his tattoos, which is why he has it up around this new tribe.
Okay, well, now I want to see a noir version of BWD. Those greyscale panels are fantastic!
For some reason I love Bevan’s kind of sheepish/eager grin as he’s describing how he’ll infiltrate the fort XD
Something tells me things are not going to go as smoothly as Bevan believes he will in his awesome noir panel. If Quin ends up on the walls during evening/night somehow, I bet we can expect to see a duel between those two that is definitely going to end up alerting the garrison and spoiling Hardin’s plans.
This is not going to endear the two to each to each other at all.
When do these plans *ever* go as smoothly as predicted?
On the other hand, if Hardin were to fail at this point, it would pretty much nip the story in the bud, so I expect there will be some level of success!
The big question is what they’re going to do about that keep in the middle. It looks pretty impenetrable, and I doubt Bevan can pull off the infiltration move twice. If they were to get all the way across the far wall (you couldn’t stay in the outer courtyard for long – it’s designed to offer no cover whatsoever from archers in the keep), they could cut off the garrison and besiege it, but I don’t see much long term benefit to this – Aisling would be quick enough to send in an army to break the siege.
True enough. That or Hardin will be forced to deviate to plan B, whatever that may be. It’s going to be interesting to see how he plans to topple the Canid empire just by squeezing his way into Deltrada for his first move, unless he wishes for a hostage situation of some sort, and even then we don’t know how benevolent Canid are towards their own that have failed and been captured by a load iceslagging Ermehn.
If the Canid general is there, the Ermehn might be able to get more than if it were just nameless soldiers.
Ah! I forgot about the fact that one of the generals is there. That changes things.
I think your point stands, though; the Canid likely won’t tolerate their own soldiers getting taken over by a bunch of Ermehn.
Hardin isn’t planning to topple the Canid empire, but to secure a cushy life for himself and his band. They are going to steal the silver bullion meant for soldiers’ wages and abscond, calling it now. (Cue Mexican standoff in the mountains, steel guitar noises)
But how can you possibly have a Mexican standoff without the sound of rattlesnakes in the background? It looks a bit cold for them there.XD
I can see it now…
Dak and Quin on wall with Canid sentries… Dak fooling around, cracking jokes and such. Serious Quin sighs and looks over the wall. Sees something move in the shadows.
“Ah- Dak?” of course he’s ignored (that whole commanding a room thing coming back to haunt him)…. “Dak?”
Bevan is up and on the wall. Quin finally notches an arrow. “Get down!”
;)
Ooh, I love the greyscale pages too! BTWD Noir would be a wonderful idea!
And yeah, something about that sheepish grin on Bevan’s face… It’s almost as if he’s imagining that everything will go so VERY smoothly and he’ll kill any Canid guard he comes across and the attack will succeed perfectly and he’ll be the hero of the Ermehn and all the babes will be throwing themselves at him… I dunno, there’s something so very childish and over-eager about it, which does fit with his rather youthful appearance and personality so far.
You make a good point about the advantages of the webcomic format in allowing you to edit and update the pages to better fit with later developments. However, some people might have the view that any story should stand on its own as it was written, even if the beginning is a bit clumsy or doesn’t fit perfectly with how it later develops. For me, the biggest problem is that the original format of the pages sometimes disappear forever when they’re updated, which is why I always try to save newly posted pages to make sure I have both versions.
THD!
Hmm, another great page!!! :)
The colours here are great and I love the way Bevan’s ‘predictions’ are in black and white with muted hints of colour. Makes them seen very whimsical – like they’re there in potential, but not real (real would have colour).
The first frame I love. Why? The eyes of each character. Hardin chooses not to make eye contact and instead stares at the map, his own plans formulating in his mind no doubt. Bevan eyes are looking straight at Hardin with all his youthful arrogance and is practically willing Hardin to look up and see his ‘bravery.’ And then there’s Ashtor (who sometimes I wonder why he’s even in Hardin’s horde because he seems to be against most ideas) – you can tell by his look he is not impressed by Bevan’s declaration and plan. Great juxtaposing views there.
Bevan’s look in the second frame is one of mixed emotions. In the first frame, he is very firm and hard, but in this one, presumably when all eyes are on him waiting to hear his plan, he softens a bit. He’s got that kind of casual smirk that says confidence, but his eyes are round with a slight furrow which to mean says he’s not 100% sure of himself. I mean, his words say he’s got it all figured out and his imaginings show doing it, but his expression holds a hint of uncertainty. Which is normal, really. Presumably, this is the first attack on a garrison he’s done and while he’s been a scout and spy, sneaking into a fortress teaming with the opposition’ army can be a scary thing. Especially, when you are all alone doing it. Kudos for his enthusiasm though – as ill-fated as it may turn out to be.
And then we have Hardin pondering things – really, he hasn’t pondered anything. There’s no discussion on tactics. It’s just straight to it, which is normal for a comic I suppose, because who really wants to waste frames and pages on dialogue that essentially means nothing. So, Hardin jumps right into it and tells them to break camp. Why am I picturing a football huddle here…. Ready and Break! Hahaha (Sorry. I’m tired.)
Anyways, I can’t wait for the next frames because I think they’re going to be of Quin and Dak as they arrive at the Deltrada!
Cheers and sharp quills,
FT
P.S. I love the details of Deltrada’s ramparts. It is very realistic that the walls would be made with pieces of stone and not solid brick slabs. And the torch scones with their overhead covers – nice touch. :)
I like this page. I’d say more, but it’s all been said already. Keep up the good work!
“Enerus, you WILL wear that sweater your mother-in-law knitted!”
“I knew drinking that much egg nog would end up with me waking up married! *Mumble*”
“Last time I ever try to be festive.”
I just noticed the mouths of all the characters are way more human-like than their real counterparts, otherwise, How would Bevan be able to gag that hypotetical Canid by putting his hand over their muzzle? One a real wolf, it would be easier to just grab the muzzle shut, which is still kinda hard.
In the original sketch that’s exactly what he was doing. And it looked really weird, so I changed it to something that read better.
. . . and they say Enerus the Canid’s heart grew three sizes that day . . .
. . . wait . . .
…………………It’s not Bevan
THE CLOAKED FIGURE IN THE PROLOGUE IS NOT BEVAN (Unless Rachel deliberately left out the tattoos in which case that’s cheating. >:{